Counting Down...

Well, in just over a week I’ll be moving from probably the most land-locked state in the nation to a tiny island in the middle of the Eastern Caribbean. Nervous? Yes. Excited? Heck yeah.

Since I’ve been home in good ole Kansas and have told people who’ve asked about my life’s direction (ahh!) that I’ll be joining the Peace Corps, most everyone responds with a “wow, that’s really great” or some other answer of approval. The next question they ask is inevitably “where are you headed?” After telling people the Eastern Caribbean, I most oftentimes get a “whoa, that’ll be a nice vacation!,” or “Beach Corps…sweet!” (I really like that one…:)). Even though I’m thrilled about the opportunity to play Gilligan for two years living in a tropical paradise, I know that my time in the Peace Corps will be no vacation. From what I’ve heard from people who have served in the Eastern Caribbean and elsewhere, the Peace Corps certainly comes with its fair share of challenges: loneliness, feeling worthless at times, culture shock, etc. So, while I am really excited about having the chance to experience probably one of the most beautiful places in the world (all those cruise ships don’t go there for nothing), I must admit I’m also a bit ambivalent about what lies ahead.

I think this ambivalence is rooted in the fact that I still don’t really have a clear idea of what I’ll be doing while I’m down there. Based on the information I was given, I could be helping an established organization better meet the needs of the people, trying to improve different social or health services, or a number of other things. I suppose they would be contradicting the very nature of “community development” if they got much more specific. I’ve been corresponding with a guy down on St. Vincent and the Grenadines and have asked him some questions about his experience so far. His response to whether or not after the training period he felt adequately prepared to do his job and had a clear idea of what that entailed was, “I pretty much got dropped off.” Although some people do get placed with organizations, he was essentially left to his own devices when it came to assessing how to help the community. His first couple of months were therefore really difficult as he wasn’t sure what to do or how to go about helping. Yeah sure, I kind of hoped for a slightly more pleasant answer, but I’m glad that he was honest about his challenges and doubts. I still hope to have at least a bit more of a framework from which to start though…

Even though the uncertainty of what awaits me makes me a bit nervous, I’m excited to be stretched and challenged. After all, I didn’t sign up thinking it would be a vacation and would be pretty disappointed if that’s merely what it turned out to be. I trust that I’m going there for a reason, that God will encourage and teach me through the challenging and lonely times, and that ultimately what I learn from my experiences will be invaluable.

In the meantime, it’s back to eating blueberries and hoping they’re in plentiful supply down there. :)